The Final Fling

Well, we’ve decided to fling the last of our hopes and finances at one cycle of donor egg ICSI. We are at the beginning stage.  This Tuesday I drive my Sister, (our potential donor), to our doctor for the initial appointment, followed by an appointment with the nurses and another with the counsellor.  Three arduous appointments in the same day, arranged as such because my sister lives in a different city.   She is not their “ideal” candidate because she has not had children of her own.  I, too, am hesitant about agreeing to this for that reason – along with many others.

This is our last chance for a child.  I feel as though there is an expectation from the clinic that I should be enthusiastic and hopeful about this.  In reality I am sad.  I do not hold out much hope for the “approval” of my sister as a donor and, after our own wildly unsuccessful cycles, I do not hold our much hope for a successful outcome should the procedure go ahead.

What  I am enormously grateful for is the love that flows so generously from my Sister.  Love  that she has demonstrated every step of the way.

I am also so grateful, tired but grateful, that we are finally at the end.  Whatever the outcome, after this, we move on.  On and outward. Out into the world.

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One Response to “The Final Fling”

  1. jodie38 Says:

    I hear where you’re coming from, and hope so much for you…..

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