They’re everywhere!



So, I’m going to sound like the wicked witch of the west…but have you noticed, Children are everywhere!  At least it seems that way to me.  Last weekend we had to go to my husband’s family lunch.  All nice people who have kids.  We are the only ones who don’t and after a day watching other people’s kids, and discussing their growth and development, I was wrecked.  I do have a lovely Mother-In -Law who knows about infertility.  All her children are adopted.  At the end of the day she came up to me and gave me a hug and told me that she was so sad for us and hoped we’d be able to move on with our lives together.  She thanked me for being such a wonderful wife to her son.  I can’t tell you how much this meant to me, after all, it is I that has the major medical problem.  I’m not sure most Mother-In Law’s would be this thoughtful.  She also said that she was praying for us and that she loved me.  Wow!  I was emotionally in the wringer for the best and worst of reasons.  

I’ve needed time out to recover but haven’t managed to get any yet.  My course is in its final week, and pretty stressful, this is not helped by the fact that one of the younger women announced last night that she was pregnant.  Of course I congratulated her along with everyone else…but it really hurt.  When I planned this course around IVF, it was with the expectation that I would become pregnant sometime during the year and I had fantasties of being able to tell my friends and classmates that I was pregnant.  It felt as though she were living out my dream.  It was very odd.

And then today I felt hijacked again.   I went to a cafe to try and sit by myself; to allow myself a little treat; to try and get out in public so I wouldn’t bawl my eyes out.  I’d got my chai latte and settled down with my embroidery, when out of the corner of my eye a little girl approached me. She was curious about what I was doing. Her  Mother let her wander over to me.  I gave her some threads of her own choosing to play with because I am not actually the wicked witch and because I hoped it would satisfy her and she’d go and show her Mum and that would be it.   I didn’t really want to look after her so I tried to signal to her mother that perhaps she should take her back by saying “I don’t think she’s quite old enough for a needle  and thread yet”.  But the mother just smiled happily, watching her little daughter and saying that she probably wanted the froth from my coffee.    Now I’m not saying that she was inappropriate or that her daughter wasn’t a cutie pie….but why is it that many mother’s seem to think it’s perfectly ok for their children to go up and bother someone who’s having coffee alone for more than a couple of minutes? 


And yes I realise I was too subtle.  I could have been more direct and actually said that I was looking for some alone time. Or I could have just packed up and moved to another table. But wouldn’t that have been rude?  Besides which, I’ve done this before and endured the huffs and mutters under the breath.

I’m not the wicked witch, really. It’s just that I’m having a meltdown.


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One Response to “They’re everywhere!”

  1. jodie38 Says:

    Oh, yes…. they are everywhere, aren’t they? What a wonderful thing for your MIL to say…. that kind of support is priceless.

    You’re not a wicked witch – not at all. You just need a moment without someone else’s kid eyeballing your froth, thank you! That was a bit over the top. But, telling her to come get her kid would be difficult for me as well.

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