Wow…I didn’t realise how useful this blog could be…but I just need to write.  Now!

So…you know the situation.  We don’t have kids and after 6 and 1/2 years of trying and, after a very poor response to IVF we are getting ready to accept the fact that we probably won’t.  In the meantime all but a few of our friends have had children and this has changed our relationships with them.  Very few, (make that, none), of our friends with kids can understand our situation.  So recently I’ve been thinking to myself that I must culitvate and/or renew some friendships with people who don’t have kids. 

Last week I made a call to an old friend that I hadn’t seen for about a year.  We live about 2 hours away from one another.   The last time I saw her she and I were in the same situation.  Unable to get pregnant.  She, for unexplained reasons; me, for many explained reasons.  Well, we played phone tag for a couple of days and today I finally got hold of her. I did realise that it was a risk…who knows what can happen in a year.  Well, Guess what?!

She’s had twins!    Yep, IVF was successful for her.  Now,  don’t get me wrong, I am very, very happy to hear that she has been able to have the children she longed for. And I’m also glad to hear her sound so thrilled with her new role as a mother.  But did she have to say at the end of our conversation “Well… don’t worry , it can happen”.    And then did she have to say “Well, I’m glad to hear everything is going well for you”…huh?  Did you not just hear me say that IVF isn’t working? That it is infact NOT going well? Don’t you remember what it was like?

So…another friend not able to understand despite the fact that she’s been through it.  Buggger.  That’s all I need right now.


P.S Now I do realise that she was probably doing a double flip trying to work out how to tell me, and that she was pretty uncomfortable too.  I know this affects others negatively too.  It’s just that I can’t be responsible for making this alright for everyone else to cope with.  It’s not alright.  It’s not alright at all.


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